WD CRITIC

Wokmania is dumped on a darkened road dimming the dazzle of Birmingham's China Town. On approach to the stale steamy windowed restaurant, one would assume that there is an elegant looking oriental buffet presentation. This however is the bait. If you like your Chinese food pre-flavoured as standard with tomato ketchup and your black bean oriental flavourings to imitate HP sauce then hey presto: me thinks that Wokmania, Birmingham could unfortunately be the place for you. I really am being fair as sources have said that Wokmania food is ‘more mental hospital than oriental hospitality'. The midland and Birmingham local press have reported Wokmania's previous closure for refurbishment but what the hell was it like before I ask? It has unquestionably reopened as Wokmania, a secure unit for those insane or mental but definitely not oriental! Please, do not take a date, your family or anyone you know, like or love. Wokmania is in fact a good place to take an enemy before putting them out of their misery down a dark midland alley. If any positive reviews are written for Wokmania then I promise you that they are either paid staff, or that of the Wokmania management bound for a good lynching. WD Critics Recommendations to Wokmania If you want to portray an authentic oriental taste then please, please, stop using Lidls own tomato ketchup. By the way, don't get confused, I am in no way recommending Heinz tomato ketchup brand instead: just lay off using ketchup or brown sauce in Wokmania buffet food altogether. Fancy décor is not going to disguise Wokmania's poor quality of food. Smell the food you serve: the smell of stale food can be something of a put off. Wokmania Positives Nice décor. Fun self-service ice cream pump. (Excellent feature) Soft drinks refills. (Needed to disguise the awful taste of food) Vast selection of desserts (All poor- moderate standard) Wokmania Negatives Food tasting stale with a strong pre-flavoured taste of tomato ketchup or brown sauce. Very poor selection of food. Food is not an authentic taste of Chinese nor is it of an acceptable standard. Not good value for money (except refill of soft drinks.) Food smells stale Wokmania Value Food: Not worth a penny (even in an economic down turn like the credit crunch!) Drinks: Good value set price soft drinks with refills. (You would need it so to disguise the awful taste of food) Overall Wokmania Rating: 1/5 Wokmania in a word: Disgusting This WD Critic Rating is valid at time of writing December 2008. Other Oriental Buffets Recommended Big Wok, very popular oriental buffet of Birmingham. If going at weekend- book early because this is a major Birmingham favourite. www.bigwok.co.uk Aroma, nationwide. This is a fantastic chain of authentic oriental buffet cuisine. Aroma sets the standard for oriental buffets. Check out their website. www.thearoma.co.uk/ Ocean Pearl, superior oriental buffet of Bath. If visiting the area of Bath, forget the roman history and indulge yourself in a most amazing authentic oriental experience, atmosphere and presentation. Check out their website. www.oceanpearl-bath.co.uk WD Critic 2008/ 2009

WD CRITIC - 07/12/2008 | report this review